Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Despite loving New York and Moscow,

I feel small and lonely when I am there. When I landed in LA for the first time almost 10 years ago, I thought it was one of the ugliest, disjointed cities I had ever visited. Now I think that LA in fact has a unified theme - coexistence of beautiful and ugly. I never felt like LA was a CITY. More like an amalgamation of parts and pieces. LA waited for 10 years for it's revenge. Today, it made me feel small and lonely. It happened when I was driving out from the Disney Concert Hall and didn't take my usual route but stayed straight to turn left on 4th. The underpass, the underbelly, the womb of Downtown were towering above me, crowding me from the sides, and pushing me from behind. They were distant and close at the same time. As I sat at the light, the moment felt like birth, with me going through passages to greet the light. Strange...

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